Thank you for applying to Ataraxion! Before we can make a final decision on your application, however, we would like to see revisions on the following.
◆ While your application is a strong and thorough extrapolation from canon, we would like to see Marissa's independent character potential in Ataraxion explored more. ◆ We would revisions to your personality section with a better look at how Marissa might react to and adapt to being on the ship, independent of Hanna's presence. On the latter, though, we would like an examination of why she may choose to continue hunting Hanna while on board, despite being in such a strange and dangerous situation. ◆ While your log sample is a strong example of inner character voice and motivation, we would like a revised sample that demonstrates more understanding of and character interaction with the game setting. We would suggest, for this, something set in a past game event.
Please reply with the necessary information within 72 hours. If you require an extension, please contact a mod before your time expires. Thank you!
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